Update Apr 2012

its been awhile. Xian just flew to Japan. I have been busy working. At least this job isn't boring as I thought it would. Tim drove us to Penang to meet xian before she fly to Japan. I cried. Was thinking if I am able to send my kids oversea next time when they grow up. Separating with someone you love is hard. She just reached today, and called us back. She told us that she likes there somehow.

There is an event tomorrow. I got to help up as I am still new. Hopefully its not as tiring as every working day. There is still ton of mini tasks that I haven't done.

My superior, very pretty and capable lady. Single, 28 this year. She really look attractive to me when she is working. She even look attractive when she is around us. Alot of guys are aftering her, but she is looking for a guy who must be older than her by 7 years. Thats her limit. Her choice of guy is super duper unique to me. We have been talking awhile. I find her facing the same problem as mine when comes into relationship. But this is our secret, no one should know yet. However, I hope I would be as capable as her in two years time! I know I can!

I have no time for crying. Got to concentrate and finish up for the fyp i have not done. still a little bit more to go. My head gonna burst soon. But I believe God will never give us more than we can handle. Whatever I have done wrong, I can't look back, I can only look forward, not to make the same mistake, and continue my journey where He has plan. But if I have a second chance, I will make 10 times better. Till then.

Things I want to get in 2012

1. A job. An interesting job that i won't get bored.
2. Compact Digital Camera. (budget : RM1.5k - June)
3. A watch. (budget : RM1k)
4. Get rid of dark circle (Go to beauty center)
5. A car - Myvi for now will do. (Monthly installment - RM500)
6. Burberry Handbag (budget: RM3k)

7. Happy, get rid of depression, low confidence and low self esteem!

8. A house. would be in 2014-2015.

9. Improve my scar leg.

10. A laptop.

11. A nice hair cut.

To be continue....

ITs nice to read back of what I have written down previously. *self check* no improvement. I have been in my comfort zone for long. This is not good. I need to finish up my fyp ASAP. *stepping out of comfort zone to the war street*!! Got to get some armor and face all the difficulties. Good luck to me!

I dont feel good today. The dream was so real. I tought I'm going to lose someone in my dream. Sigh.. Alot of things happen so fast that I don't able to react. The feeling suck to max. I hope there is someone To calm me down now.

信

这是一封写给自己看的信。我知道在感情上，我有时候很不成熟。老是只会等待，却不会自我保护。我觉得我在这次的感情上学了很多。不知从什么时候开始，我又渐渐的走入爱情毯上。我真的很开心。直到前几天，因为我的小差错，而导致他不开心。虽然他不再计较，我的心却一直放不下。我很想知道他在想什么。我很想知道他还关心我吗？我的心好像在滴血一样。不知是我敏感，还是他的确有在避开我。好了，yiling，十年后在看这封信吧。看看自己是个怎样的人。

草于，
Elaine Ong

Angriest thing

I have being throwing tantrum since past month. Small room housemate is way too wasteful. I just received the bill today. And it's up to RM200 for almost 3 months!! What the hell? It is always around RM30. And now, I have to pay for the electricity and water that I have never use?? FML!! I don't know who to talk to. My Rm200 will be just gone like that. And still it does not include my rental. This is really disappointing. Heart is so pain. The middle room girl moved out last month. I called her to pay, she told me that she doesn't use that much of electricity and refuse to pay. What shall I do? I'm crying again. Sigh.